This is the EU

  • 0 Replies

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.


Offline the leveller

  • Global Moderator
  • *****
  • 4128
  • +75/-0
This is the EU
« on: April 19, 2016, 04:17:12 PM »
A farmer, named Sam, was overseeing his animals in a remote hilly pasture

in Hereford when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced toward him out of a

cloud of dust.


The driver, a young man in a Brioni® suit, Gucci® shoes, RayBan®

sunglasses and YSL® tie, leaned out the window and asked the farmer,

"If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd,

will you give me a calf?"  Sam looks at the man, who obviously is a

yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing animals and calmly

answers, "Sure, why not?"


The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell® notebook computer,

connects it to his Cingular RAZR V3® cell phone, and surfs to a NASA

page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an

exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA

satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.


The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop® and

exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany.


Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot® that the image

has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses an MS-SQL®

database through an ODBC connected Excel® spreadsheet with email on

his Blackberry® and, after a few minutes, receives a response.


Finally, he prints out a full-colour, 150-page report on his hi-tech,

miniaturized HP LaserJet® printer, turns to the Farmer and says, "You

have exactly 1,586 cows and calves."


"That's exactly the right number. Well, I guess you can choose and take one then," says Sam.


He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on with

amusement as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.  Then

Sam says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your

business is, will you give me back my calf?"


The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?"


"You're a Member of the European Parliament", says Sam.


"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"


"No guessing required" answered Sam. "You showed up here even though

nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already know,

to a question I never asked.  You used millions of pounds’ worth of

equipment trying to show me how much smarter than I you think you

are; and you don't know a thing about how working people make a living

- or about cows, for that matter.  This is a flock of sheep.


Now give me back my dog.




[and I would also like to add that the farmer, likely, only got back one third of his dog too! – Anthony]


Share this topic...
In a forum
In a site/blog

SMF spam blocked by CleanTalk